Done and Dusted - Lyla Sage

She’s off-limits, but he’s never been good at following the rules.

For the first time in her life, Clementine “Emmy” Ryder has no idea what she’s doing. She’s accomplished everything on her to-do list. She left her small hometown of Meadowlark, Wyoming; went to college; and made a career for herself by doing her favorite riding horses. But after an accident makes it impossible for her to get back into the saddle, she has no choice but to return to the hometown she always wanted to escape. (link)

Review: 2/5

I picked up this book with the premise that it was going to be amazing simply because the cover art was like nothing I’ve ever seen before. The cover art drew me by having such an enigmatic energy that I can only describe as heartfully and fantastically folk. If you know me at all, you know how much I love Western culture. I'm especially drawn to the essential modernization and hippie-fication facing the Western aesthetic, as well as the current immersion and growth of appreciation for the original roots of Indigenous American heritage with it. However, as we know most times, when I’m drawn to something that's pretty (like my ex crushes) it crashes and burns. I may sound overdramatic, and that’s because I am; suffice to say it, I didn’t like this book.

The first thing that I have beef with is the TikTok-ification of books. My friend Sarah and I have dived deeply in conversation about how a lot of depth and character growth is lacking within a lot of modern books, in lieu of creating in-depth and overly dimensional spicy scenes. When we finish these TikTok books (yeah, I’m speaking for Sarah whether she likes it or not), there is a gaping hole of something missing… Oh… It might be character development? I give Lyla Sage credit where credit is due, the smut was pretty good. But as someone who is expanding her tastes in books and literature, I find the consistent focus on “spicy scenes” to be very underwhelming for satisfaction overall. No pun intended.

I think the amount of romances I’ve read that are small town living and Hallmark-channel-esque is tiring for me. Is it too much to ask for a romance that isn’t based around where the characters physically reside? I shit you not, probably five of the last eight romance books I’ve read have been focused on the physical setting of our characters, and why it plays such an important role in their relationship development. NO ONE CARES!?!?! That’s just not realistic for EVERY SINGLE RELATIONSHIP in real life! Why is it such a common theme in story-telling now?

Shout out Chat GPT for the names we were given in the book as well! Clementine “Emmy” Ryder and Luke Brooks… You just can’t get cheesier, American, or more barf-ey than that. Where is the originality?

I felt that Emmy’s background story was extremely underdeveloped. She went through an extremely traumatic event of almost dying in the same way that her mother did (classic) and the main male lead (Luke, of course) comes to the rescue and offers to retrain her. Awhhh he holds her during panic attacks. Classic!! But what about therapy; y'all just don’t think of that, do you? Maybe the western hemisphere of America just doesn’t have time or the resources for therapy. Maybe cowboys don’t know what therapists are. Someone prove me wrong.

And not to let my state nationalism get the best of me, but the consistent mention of how Emmy didn’t find home in Colorado frustrated me. But that’s probably just my homesickness from me currently living in England coming out! Cawww cawww, home of the brave!

Then, of course, I can’t forget to mention the classically, overzealous and protective, older brothers. Of course the male lead is best friends with and was basically raised with them! Of course a fist fight breaks out when the older brothers find out that the female and male lead are in a romantic relationship. And that relationship has been kept a secret this whole time (duh). It really is a tale as old as time; and it’s also a tale that’s overdone. I’m tired of reading about these secretive, unhealthy, and protective relationships that revolve around thinking like “oh, no, we started off as friends with benefits, but now we’re so in love” and “ oh, I have anxiety attacks but he holds me while I have them so I’m OK and I’m healed”.

Maybe I just need to never read romance again. Maybe I need to never read shitty romance again. Or maybe I need to read military romance, like my best friend keeps suggesting… even though I’m staunchly against it. Nothing can get worse than this though, right?

Even though I didn’t really like this book, I can attempt to appreciate it for what it was. It’s trending on Book-Tok, it’s smutty, and it’s focused on Western culture (not in my preferred way, but hey, I can’t have it all). So this playlist is fairly simple by focusing on classic American country. Do you ever imagine what it might feel like to own a bar in a tiny little western town, and how it also might feel to see your best friend's little sister walk in, and she’s looking fine as ever? Now put that feeling in a song. Actually, put it in a playlist! Oh wait, I already did.

Spotify: LINK